The winter season is typically accompanied by not only the happiness of family reunions, but also (and let’s be honest) some stress. It’s not only adults who feel the pressure of the holidays, either. Children may also experience holiday stress, often in more understated ways. For example, they might feel let down when the season doesn’t live up to the idealized version they see in movies, TV specials, or on social media.
The holidays don’t always have to be so stressful however. If you’re wondering how to best handle the chaos, here are some great stress management tips for your family during the holidays.
Tip 1: Be Realistic
Naturally, you may want your holidays to be an enchanting celebration, filled with joyful guests, a meal that everyone talks about, and wonderful memories to cherish for years. However, things don’t always go the way we expect them to, even when we plan everything to a T.
That’s why it’s important to set more practical expectations. You don’t need to go all out with the traditions if it doesn’t suit you, and you definitely don’t have to go overboard with planning when it comes to your kids. They will appreciate the room you make for free time/downtime.
You don’t have to do everything by yourself either; ask for help when you need it! Consider getting a few reliable family members to bring side dishes for meals, help rearrange your dining and living room furniture, or come up with fun activities for the kids. Keep in mind when it comes to the kids, it can help you to be realistic with them about how much you expect and do with them.
Tip 2: Set Boundaries
You can’t pick your family, and there will always be certain relatives who share their certain thoughts. It’s totally okay to say no to another family gathering, especially if you want to spend it with just your closest relatives. It’s also more than okay to set limits on what can be talked about at the dinner table or during family gatherings. If someone brings up a topic you’d rather not discuss, let them know.
If you feel stuck about this, practicing your responses beforehand can help. Here are some suggestions. Go with whichever works best for you:
- “This topic is really important, but maybe we can chat about it another time. Let’s just enjoy each other’s company for now.”
- “It looks like we have different opinions on this. How about we agree to disagree and switch to something we can all enjoy talking about?”
- “I think we could all use a break from this subject tonight. What do you say we talk about something a bit lighter?”
- “The holidays are all about coming together and celebrating. Let’s keep the mood light and focus on what makes us happy.”
You can also shift the conversation to things like upcoming plans, fun activities people have done recently, and more. It’s a good idea to have a list of topics ready so you can easily change the subject.
Another approach is to create separate areas for discussions where people can really dive into a topic. Guide them to one of those spots to continue their conversation.
Tip 3: Have Fun
Spend some quality time together in real time, where you engage in an activity. Going to the movies or having a family movie night is great and a nice way to wrap up a hectic day, however it may be better to consider activities that promote real interaction.
Play games together. Check out a museum together. Bake some cookies. Establish some family holiday traditions if you don’t have any yet. These are some solid examples of how you can connect.
Tip 4: Make Time for Self-Care
Even if you and your kids enjoy the holiday season, it can still be quite overwhelming. However you and your family plan to celebrate, it’s important to carve out some time for yourself and your kids to keep stress to a minimum. Here are a few ideas:
- Take a stroll. If someone offers to join you, just be honest about needing some alone time; being clear about your needs will help them understand you better.
- Have a dance party. This is a great way for kids to get that pent-up high energy and excitement for the holidays out of their systems.
- Book a salon appointment ahead of time. Treat yourself to a haircut, manicure, or a massage. This will give you a chance to step out and unwind.
- Bubble baths for the kids. This is a good moment for your child to wind down and enjoy a quiet moment to themselves.
- Turn in early for the night. Bring along a good book or magazine. You don’t need to justify your choice—simply tell your family you’re feeling tired and want to take a break.
- Colouring. For the kids, this can be a great time to colour one of their books or let them colour freehand, their way.
Tip 5: Stick to Your Routine When You Can
Kids can get cranky when they’re tired and overwhelmed, which happens easily during the holidays. And a change in routine can be tough for everyone, especially for kids. So, do your best to keep your child on their usual schedule as much as you can.
Kids thrive when their routines are predictable and healthy. This is especially true when it comes to sleep. Even though it might be tempting to let them stay up late and sleep in during the holidays, try to keep it within an hour of their regular times, except for special occasions like New Year’s Eve.
We all feel better when we stick to our sleep routines. Keeping things consistent with sleep, meals, and playtime gives kids a sense of stability, even when the holiday season gets hectic.
Tip 6: Get the Kids Involved and Informed
Keeping kids in the know can help ease their worries and make them feel part of the family plans. So make sure to keep them up to date, such as where you’re headed if you’re traveling, who’s coming for family gatherings, and fun activities they can look forward to. Holiday schedules can change a lot, especially when traveling. However, kids tend to adjust better when they have an idea of what’s coming up.
It’s also a great idea to include your children in the planning or making of holiday traditions, whether it’s baking, cooking, crafting, or decorating. That way you’re not doing everything on your own, and it can turn into a fun family activity too.
Tip 7: Let Go of Perfection
Understand that family get-togethers might not be flawless. Welcome the little quirks as part of the family fun. Often, the best memories arise from surprises or things that weren’t planned.
Dealing with family dynamics during the holidays can be tough, but using these tips can help you have a more relaxed and enjoyable time with your family. Keep in mind, the aim isn’t to get rid of all stress but to handle it in a manner that lets you savor the joy of the season.
Tip 8: Find Coping Strategies Ahead of Time
When you’re up against a stressful situation, it can help to try out different coping strategies in advance. Anxiety tends to mess with our memory and decision-making skills, so expecting yourself to make choices while stressed is a lot to handle. By picking and rehearsing the strategies you want to use ahead of time, you take some of the pressure off your brain when it’s time to make those snap decisions.
If you know your child is going to struggle somewhere during the season, it’s a good idea to practice these coping strategies with them. For example, you could both practice breathing exercises together, or come up with topics of conversation that you can pick, choose, and rehearse with them.
Questions? Reach Out Today
Supportive Steps sends warm wishes to you and/or your child for the upcoming holiday season. I understand from personal experience how stressful it can be, and I want you to not only survive but also thrive through it all. If you need assistance in preparing, please feel free to schedule an appointment.
It’s essential to understand that counselling is not just for serious psychological issues or difficult problems, but also for maintaining your everyday mental health. This kind of support is a vital part of self-care and overall wellness.
I provide a variety of treatment options for all members of your family, all in a setting where you will feel supported and understood. Let’s collaborate to ensure the holiday season is as stress-free as possible. Book a free 15-minute consultation here today.